So Craig Venter decided to rip me off. His people are saying they built synthetic life acting like synthetic life is new and shit. I’ve known synthetic existed for years. Whether it be synthetic friends who hang until the rock run out, agents who say “listen Bobby to make money you actually have to make music and tour, and could you please put your testicles back in your pants”, of fake ass women who are like “I love you forever Bobby” and then call the police after a couple right hooks to face, believe me I know synthetic life.
Apparently the difference is that his synthetic life was made in a lab and not out of desire for Bobby Brown’s money. Half these Hollywood bitches are synthetic Autotune, Protools, y’all sound like gay robots (I built a gay robot once, he was very neat, great at parties but I had to scrap him after I found him fucking my toaster with Bobby Brown’s toast in it, man I love some good toast). You can’t tell me Puff Daddy is real, the guy’s lyrics are “huh, uh huh” on loop like my vicious cycle of addiction and property destruction. Also Venter apparently encoded a website into this thing’s DNA, so just like every other fake ass form of life it’s got a website to plug, why not get it a twitter feed too at least it wouldn’t be as stupid and pandering as that Oprah bitch (don’t get me wrong I love you Oprah, I’ll be your new Steadman let me in the rich fat ass of yours). Also poem lyrics in the genome? Why not “My Prerogative” by Bobby Brown, man I’d have royalties up the ass every time this cell replicates! And yo if it’s got “My Prerogative” in its genome like Bobby Brown it will be replicating a lot, if you know what I’m say’n.
But as far as I’m concerned this is just another cell keeping Bobby Brown down.
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